Relationships

Avoiding the pitfall in Teacher and Student relationships in Taoist practices

By A Chinese Teacher (?name lost?) in the USA

There are many possible pitfalls between teacher and students.

A very poignant metaphor describes danger and risk in the teacher and students within the Taoist tradition:

It is as if the teacher and student shot arrows at each other, only when their arrows meet in mid-air will both be saved. If their arrows miss, then both will be wounded.

What are the major pitfalls?
The purpose and goal of the students are different from the teachers. If a student just wants to learn the Taiji and Qigong for health reason, then he will not be willing to surrender and suffer the trial and tribulation of deeper training. In this instance, a teacher should adhere to their agreement and teach the student a simple and easy regiment of exercises and form, rather than the long extended classical style which may take more than three years to learn.

If a teacher teaches Taiji Quan and Qigong as a profession and as a mean of livelihood. Then his only interest is in doing a good enough job in order to make a good living. Thus, it is unfair to judge him as being too commercial. After all, if a man opens a restaurant and serves great food, he should be expected to be rewarded. The romantic notion of a master living in poverty and eating a bowl of rice is only fiction and in Hollywood films. It is unrealistic to expect someone living within the present culture of materialism to adhere to this code of simplicity. Even in traditional China people had to teach for a living because that was all that they did, train in the Chinese Arts.

A student hits a resistance along the way and starts to project and transfers his own past trauma into the relationship. This kind of transference is extremely difficult to deal with even if one is trained in psychotherapy. Thus, after three to five years, this kind of students will tend to leave with bitterness. The pattern is extremely common.

The Pattern
First year: great enthusiasm in the teacher and teaching. Willing to do anything to spread the art. The teacher, if he is not careful, is swept away by the student's energy and started to create intimate bonding.

Second and third year: having really taste the sweetness of the Taoist art, the students now want to learn more and even try to emulate the teacher by enrolling in teacher training courses.Fourth and Fifth year: hitting resistance, having transfer the authority figure to the teacher, now the student starts to challenge and fight and question the teacher. This is the "falling out of love" phase and since most Taiji and Qigong teacher lack the proper understanding of how to deal with projection and transference. The teacher got trapped and embroiled in the student's neurosis. After a huge crisis, the student leaves and tries to find other teacher/s who are more conductive to his sense of what a teacher "should be". But the same pattern will occur again with the new teacher.

The above pattern could also apply to a teacher who is not completely healed as a human being. My master called such teacher a "cracked pot" though he carries the teaching within [his problems will] gradually leak out and [the situation] becomes messy. Hence, a teacher who carries within himself unresolved traumas will most likely project his insecurity onto the students. And in the cross cultural interaction between a native born Chinese teacher and western student much pain and conflict arises out of cultural misunderstanding of loyalty, responsibility and romantic projection.

Testing Situations
The pitfalls are as old as time. In the classical tradition there are safeguards that help the teacher and student relationships. A teacher will test a student's character and nature before accepting him:

The classical situation of a novice having to stand at the temple gate for a week before being accepted is a very good test. For if a novice can withstand this treatment, that shows a level of maturity and patience in dealing with adversity and conflict that will arise during his training. However, in most commercial school, due to survival, a teacher will accept anyone who can afford to pay. And that is why in many Taiji adult education classes in the YMCA, the drop out rate in a six week course is 85%.

A student should test the teacher before becoming studying with him: Within the Chinese tradition, the student will usually bring along an elder who is a friend or colleague of the teacher. This elder will vouch for the quality of the teacher. But nowdays, the only qualification [saught] of a teacher is in his ability to fight in Taiji, or in Qigong in their fleshy performance of their healing power. None of these two traits will guarantee the qualities of a teacher. A great piano player or artist may not be necessary a good teacher. Picasso was so mean and nasty to his students that no one wanted to study art with him. This is one of the biggest pitfalls.

Don't Judge
To judge a teacher by his powers and fighting skill blinds the students. Certainly, great Taiji and Qigong masters should able to manifest the power of the training. But they usually don't. A better way to judge a teacher is to get to know his students. Is the student arrogant and show too much pride in their fighting skill. Ask a few questions in the history of Taiji Quan and Qigong. Study the subject ahead of time. If you are a student and find yourself trapped in this pattern, falling in love, falling out of love, leaving in bitterness, then changing teachers will not improve your life and your spiritual cultivation.These are the students who have amassed a large repertoire of different styles and form. Stop looking for the external teacher, look within yourself for the solution and sickness.

If you are a teacher constantly find yourself trapped in this pattern, falling in love, falling out of love, blaming the students as disloyal, then most likely you have to mend your crack, your insecurity. Do not use teaching as a way to boast your ego.Limit the claim of what you teach. Do not pretend to be a Guru, a life guide. Just be simple, be an instructor that just teaches the physical practice of Taiji and Qigong.In the Tibetan tradition of Vajrayana Buddhism, to find a master is indeed great good fortune. Without a living master, to practice the Way is like swimming in shark infested water. It is a dangerous walk, treading on a razor's edge.

To find a good Master you must first become a good student.

[Note: Sincere thanks to the mysterious donator of this informed article]